Anquoring Tools and the Womb-Heart Connection

To walk on through pregnancy towards the unknown of birth and parenting is a challenge, we meet “what if…” around many corners.
What can we do to be less in a place of anxiety and worry and more in a place of acceptance and expectancy?
We can use tools to anchor us in the moment right now, inviting a reverent stillness within, which allows us to be aware of that which always is, which continues, which can centre and ground us.

Non-focussed awareness helps us stay focussed on what matters, rather than on things which might disturb us in our environment.
We notice a sound as something that is, passes, has no significance, can melt away into the background.
Like letting our eyes rest on nothing in particular in the space in an unfocussed way, we let our awareness rest on all that is surrounding us, letting it be, while focussing on what matters.

Our heartbeat and breath are two tools, offering us a continuum of rhythm and flow and a connection to aliveness and health.
Breathe in……………….. Breathe out……………….we must, yes, and often we do unconsciously, in short shallow gasps.
However, a slow, deliberate breath, an invitation to open to a deeper, longer breath, will create an immediate slowing down and within it, space to be present with ourselves and, within us, our baby.
Slow breaths promote wellbeing and relaxation, presence and calm.
The breath connects our spirit with our body, literally brings us into ourselves.
The breath flows in, fills our lungs with life giving oxygen, is transported by our blood to our baby.
The breath flows out, empties our lungs, expels the carbon dioxide we do not need.
The breath takes in what we need and expels what we do not.
We can use this image to visualize the breath as much more:
For example:
Breathing in, I take in strength, courage and certainty..
Breathing out, I let go of tension, doubt and impatience…
In birth the breath becomes also a tool to allow being with and expanding into the intensity of labour.
In Hypnobirthing we have the up-breathing, breathing in and out through the nose, which supports the upward motion of the muscles of the womb, tightening at the top and pulling up from the bottom, to open.
The down-breathing, breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth, supports the stage when the cervix is fully open and the baby can descend down and out.
A succession of several short out-breaths instead of one long one will focus the energy in the middle of the body above the womb and will help slow down forceful pushes.
When intensity becomes too much, sound begins, not for all but for many.
If we do not use sound but merely give in to it as an expression of being overwhelmed, the sound will quickly carry us upwards into high notes which express and enforce distress and lead us towards screaming.
Screaming focuses all energy upwards, into throat and head, and does neither bring relief nor help the birth, it will increase release of stress hormones and remove calm and reassurance from ourselves and our baby.
We can use sound consciously, aiming for the low tones of aaaa and oowe, which can aid our muscles to open and our baby to descend.
Even withholding the breath while being entirely focused on following the force of the pushes can be a tool, then, letting the breath flow back in between to nourish and replenish, is a soothing relief.
So, breath offers an anchor and many tools during birth.

The heart is more independent in it’s rhythm, it beats without our influence or control, although with our level of activity and state of mind we actively influence our heart beat.
Our heart is the steady rhythm our baby hears within us.
Our heart transports that which the breath has taken in around the body and to the baby.
Our heart is our emotional center.
Opening our heart means allowing non judgmental connection, acceptance of our self and others, to love.
We speak of ‘the heart of the matter’ to express that which truly counts.
We hold someone in our heart when we wish them well, remember them.
We experience heartache when we grieve or remember old hurt and loss.
We take things to heart when we learn something deeply, take something serious.
When we focus on our heart and heartbeat, we connect to the reason we are choosing to bring a new life into the world. They will love us, fiercely and, to begin with, unconditionally. We will love them.
If we can be aware of our heart and it’s continuing beat and power, we can focus on being alive and we can open to feeling.
The Womb-Heart-Connection creates a bond with the baby within.
Imagine a light within your heart extending out towards the baby, surrounding and holding the baby.
Rather than the baby floating on its own somewhere within us, our love, flowing from our heart, will hold the baby close, in our awareness.
This awareness brings a greater certainty about how the baby is and also what the baby needs from us right now.
It may be tempting not to connect too deeply yet, just in case. We might fear our loss would be even greater, should our baby not live long enough to meet us. But we loose out on months of close relationship with our baby inside of us. We loose out on the joy of preparing, dreaming, wishing. And our baby grows and develops lacking that which matters, a safe, loving environment,
We can imagine the light from our heart extending out into the space around us, creating a safe, personal space.
Focusing on the love within our heart and extending it out towards others, our partner, our family, our friends, other mothers in the world, nature, the love that is inherent in everything, we can find a sense of connection and not being alone.
Our heartbeat offers us a powerful anchor.
When we are focused on loving, we know why we birth and we can focus on this when we feel like giving up.
When we focus on loving, we feel connected, less alone, and stronger.
When we are aware of and connected to our baby, we have more certainty of what the baby needs us to do and decisions become easier.
When we can extend love to ourselves we can know ourselves better and therefore make better choices. We can speak our truth. We can fall apart and begin again.